There is no such thing as a stupid person. However, there are plenty of people who make stupid decisions!
If you consistently make enough stupid decisions, you end up having a habit of doing stupid things. Habits in turn become a lifestyle, and the next thing you know, you are feeling like and/or being branded as a stupid person.
No one wants to feel or to be considered stupid, so I have put together the following 7 Simple Steps for Stamping out Stupidity!
1) Paying Attention
It may come as a shock, but a lot of the stupid decisions we make are simply the result of not paying attention to what is going on around us. Did you ever accidentally run into a parked car? Miss a step on the stairs and go for a tumble? Slice the top of your thumb off while cutting up vegetables?
Those are all stupid mistakes, and every single one of them could have been avoided by simply slowing down and paying attention to what you were doing at the time. In your rush to get where you were going, navigate those stairs, or chop up those veggies, you did something that brought with it some unpleasant results, and the first thing you thought was, “Boy, that was stupid.”
2) Practicing Common Sense
The thing I love about common sense is how uncommon it can sometimes be! Many of the stupid decisions that we make could have easily been avoided by simply taking a second to think about the situation.
When you’re at a party and everyone has been drinking alcohol for hours, going to the store on a beer run is stupid – and everyone knows it. However, people still do it, and end up in jail – or worse. When your headphones aren’t working and you decide to pry them open with a sharp knife in order to fix them rather than buying a new set, that is stupid. However, serious injuries happen all the time as a result of people using inappropriate tools and/or lacking the technical expertise to “fix” something. Trust me, I have the scar on my thumb to prove it!
In each of those examples – and many more – the negativity could have been avoided by just stopping and asking, “Is this really such a good idea?”
3) Getting Educated
Avoid the stupidity label by not trying to sound like you know what you’re talking about when you don’t. You will actually look smarter by being mature enough to admit that you just don’t know something.
However, if you have a strong desire to be able to converse and/or take action in a certain arena that you are clueless about, just get educated on it! Even if you don’t have the time or the money to get a “formal” education on a subject, there isn’t much that you can’t learn about for free or for a very low cost on the Internet. You may not be able to get a diploma, a degree, or a plaque to hang on your wall, but you can at least learn enough to avoid blowing yourself up, or to avoid looking like an insufferable know it all who really doesn’t know squat about a given subject.
4) Having Confidence
One of the best ways to avoid making stupid decisions is to be confident in who you are and in the decisions that you make. How many truly ridiculous stupid mistakes have been made by people who were simply trying to fit in, or who were afraid to admit to others that they didn’t want to do something?
I worked for quite awhile at a well known gym during my personal training days, and the {ahem} natural bodybuilders were always trying to give me advice on how to “bulk up”. I heard everything from eating red meat around the clock to scarfing down egg whites 6 at a time to utilizing certain, shall we say…questionable…substances.
Long before I became a trainer, however, I practiced the “getting educated” advice from above. I knew – and still know – a lot about how to pack on muscle mass. I simply did not need their advice. However, when you weigh 180 lbs at 5’8″, and some guy who weighs almost 300 lbs at 5′ 10″ tells you what you should be doing, it takes a lot of confidence to say, “Thanks, but no thanks” to the advice that you are given. Especially if you say it to his face…
5) Surrendering
I refuse to use the term “giving up” since that is not something I am keen on doing – nor endorsing. However, there does come a time in certain situations when by continuing with the discussion or the course of action, you are going to end up looking or feeling stupid, and at that point you should bow out and cut your losses.
For example, if you’ve seen a few commercials for the latest political campaign, and you get involved in a conversation with someone about politics, for awhile you’ll be able to hold your own. However, when it turns out that this individual is an avid political follower who could all but write the foreign policy for your country, there will come a time when you need to gracefully defer to your limited amount of knowledge on the subject.
How many people do that, though? Most people will keep trying to sound like they know what they’re talking about until ultimately they feel or look like a complete idiot. By then, however, it is too late to simply admit that you’re in over your head and walk away.
6) Listening to your Instincts
I don’t know what is worse – foregoing common sense, or not listening to your instincts when they are screaming at you to do or not do something.
Have you ever gotten involved in a relationship with someone because they were really attractive, or really “dangerous,” even though there were alarm bells going off in your head so loud that you couldn’t even hear yourself think? Yep, that’s stupid.
Need proof? Think back to the last time you did that, or something similar. How’d that work out for you?
7) Swallowing your Pride
Ah, my personal favorite. The swallowing of the pride.
More stupid decisions are probably made due to this reason than all of the rest of them combined. Simply put, people do not like to admit when they are wrong, and they do not like to admit that they are in a situation that they can’t handle.
Did you ever keep a job that you hated because you did not want your friends, your co-workers, or your family to see you crawl back to the “Help Wanted” section in the newspaper, or because you didn’t want to admit that you were in over your head? Did you ever NOT take a job that you felt was “beneath you” because you were too proud to flip burgers, to deal with other people’s trash, or to pick up a mop and a bucket? If that job would have helped put food on your table or keep a roof over your head, yet your pride kept you from taking it, that’s just stupid.
In the circumstances that were just described, there were plenty of opportunities for stupidity to rear its head. However, in every circumstance, there was a way to not look or feel stupid. So, unless you enjoy feeling stupid, or being perceived as a stupid person, help stamp out stupidity by putting some of this advice to good use!
p.s. – I am qualified to have written this because I’ve made a lot of stupid decisions in my life. So before anyone gets offended that I’m picking on stupid people, remember that there are no stupid people – only stupid decisions!
I like the point where you stated that there are no stupid people. There are only stupid decisions. You explained it very well: how decisions eventually turn into habits and etc. It shows that people don’t have an excuse to keep making stupid choices. Everybody can change and improve themselves.
Jen,
Thanks for your comment, and that was exactly the point that I was wanting to get across. Even if stupid decisions have been part of the past, that is no reason to keep making them in the future!
Who hasn’t made a stupid decision? But, please don’t point that out to a person, to avoid putting them on the offense. Rather allowing them to discover the stupidity of their own decisions. I am a fan of listening and rephrasing what was said.
As my pop has said on more than one occasion, “hindsight is always more accurate than foresight”.
You got that right, Adam!
When using that hindsight, figuring out what led to the less than savory circumstances to begin with can help us to keep from doing it again in the future.
Aaron,
Fantastic and I agree with everything you wrote.
Recently, a couple of guys in Burnsville Minnesota did one of the stupidest things I’ve ever read about. They walked into a department store with two sledgehammers, smashed the jewelry counter and stole some bling. Of course they were caught about 4 hours later and are going to do 20 years in the pen.
I can’t even fathom how little thinking must have went into this. Leave the moral argument out of it. Just use very simple logic. Risk 20 years in prison for several thousand dollars in bling or get a job and buy the bling in about 3 months with no risk at all.
I would say 100% of our problems in society come from people not thinking through their actions.
One simple litmus test for taking action:
Will this action make my life and the lives of others better in the long run?
It works with crime, relationships, eating, boozing, drug use, fitness, gambling, sex, money, politics, and time management.
Follow the test, and you’ll never make another stupid decision.
Every time I make a stupid decision, I forget to think before I act. Unfortunately I still do it sometimes, but awareness is key to better decision making. Become more aware of your own decision making process and your results will improve.
Good article… I’ve made a couple of them there stupid decisions myself. I like to think I’m getting better, though… there’s more time between the stupid decisions now.
Steve,
You are absolutely right about the litmus test, and thank you so much for sharing your thoughts on how such a simple concept can make such a huge difference.
I have used a similar test in my goal attainment efforts:
“Will doing this action take me towards or away from my goals?”
It’s common sense, really, when you think about it. As you indicated, no matter what area of your life you are talking about, simply stopping to ask yourself if it is in your best interest is all it takes to know which road you need to travel.
Thanks, Steve!
HAHAHA, Jason! That’s a great way to look at it – less time between the stupid decisions!
I am totally going to use that the next time someone rails on me for doing something they think is stupid. I’ll say:
“Yeah, that was stupid, but it’s been a long time since I’ve done something stupid, so it’s not so bad! 😉
Aaron –
I was with you until #7 – the swallow your pride. Do you know what it’s like to constantly have to accept/work at one of these jobs? How personally demeaning it becomes if you always end up taking a job like this for those reasons, and you don’t love it?
I am not picking on people or jobs. For some people who are chefs and/or enjoy cooking, flipping burgers is a great thing. People who pick up trash are cleaning up the environment.
I am talking about the constant grind when you work to improve yourself and your circumstances, and yet you always end up back in the same type of job with the same low amount of pay. Swallowing your pride all the time soon leaves you with little or no pride whatsoever.
I too speak from experience. I am far from perfect; I have made my share of stupid mistakes, and at least one was a real doozy.
One of my main attributes is that I’m smart. I worked very hard through school, college, and university for my Masters, and really loved almost all of it. I love studying and learning; I like algebra and trig and math analysis. I like computers – my degrees are Computer Science (from 10 years ago) and Information Systems Management (the Masters from February). I really wanted to go into Nanotechnology and/or AI, but biological science and chemistry and I have never been friends.
And, basically, for 14-20 years I have had to “swallow my pride” and take the jobs that “helped put food on [the] table or keep a roof over [my]head,” jobs that are high-school graduate level and below. I have had coworkers that only care about what bar they’re going to after work, and how wasted they are going to get.
I am scrambling to find a job like that now, for those reasons. I am really struggling to not give up and give up on myself completely – there are several things that I have to give up anyway (another long story).
Not wanting to swallow your pride is not always stupid.
By the way, are you going to list “way[s] to not look or feel stupid” in each of these instances? Or did I misread that line? I wasn’t sure whether you had another suggestion, or that you were saying only that I should not see taking the job as stupid.
Hi Aaron and all,
I have a slightly different view.
What you have presented all mostly logical points. However, don’t forget that at that point in time, when the decision was made, a bystander is not emotionally involved, and hence a logical decision is obvious.
Just reflect back to those times when you made one of these stupid mistake, what was the emotional state during and after?
The Greeks place The 3 Rhetorical Styles in such descending sequence of influencing power:
Ethos (character),
Pathos (Emotions),
Logos (Logic).
Well obviously emotions come before logic when it comes to ability to influence.
My challenge is how do we control our emotional state in such situations to have common sense or make logical decisions that are not stupid?
Any advice?
“Listening to your Instincts” I love this point. I’ve been practicing listening and trusting my gut. For some reason, we hear it, but tend to ignore it. Why do we do that? Especially in relationships!! 🙂
I’ve found meditation to be helpful.
Great post Aaron!
Love & Gratitude,
Tina
I have a suggestion, Lawrence… when possible, wait a few moments before making the decision. Emotional reactions usually fade quickly, so if you just wait a few minutes (assuming it’s a decision where that’s a viable route), the emotions will fade a bit.
This is also known as taking a step back… essentially you remove yourself from the immediacy of the situation, looking at it from a less personal standpoint, and it makes it easier to use logic/common sense.
…wow Im happy I found your blog! I might learn here something they called life 😉
Marvin,
Welcome to Today is that Day! Glad to have you as part of the community! 🙂